In a text message once Jonathan's phone auto-corrected "pervert" as "Herbert", which quickly became our new favorite word.
It works really well because you can do Herbert for pervert, herb for perv, and my personal favorite, herberted.
I can only assume that this person is in on the joke.
BOOM BOOM BABY PICK ME UP IN YOUR MERCEDES PLEASE
alternatively
1BERT, 2, 3, PETER PAUL AND MARY